And Irina. Show 1 — Daphne

Welcome to Daphne and Irina . Show one. We have no plan. We have no producer. And we are definitely not okay.

Fruit cartography. You’ve lost your mind. (She finally looks up) What’s the theme of today’s show, by the way? Last week was “Do I have a personality, or just good taste?” The week before was “Is my ex a narcissist or just French?”

Finally. Something you’re bad at.

It’s a Gala, Irina. Not an apple. Galas have symmetry. Red is at 2 o’clock. Green is at 8. This is basic fruit cartography.

(laughing despite herself, reaching for the coffee cup) I hate this show. Daphne And Irina. Show 1

(smiles tightly) No, darling. Something I’m exhausted by. There’s a difference. Control is a rental agreement with anxiety. You think you’re the landlord. You’re not. You’re the tenant who’s afraid of the boiler.

You’re a monster.

(sits across from her) You don’t need to borrow my lines. You have chaos. Chaos is its own kind of control, you know. You keep everything messy so no one expects you to hold anything together.

(placing the last grape with tweezers) Today’s theme is control. Welcome to Daphne and Irina

And Irina. Show 1 — Daphne

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