As the night reached a fever pitch, Pedro decided to introduce the Gran Finale . "For the man who can crush a boulder with his pinky... a boulder of a different kind!"
First came the challenge. Bambam had to drink a shot from a cup held between Vilma’s knees while doing a squat. He did it. The crowd went wild. Pablo fainted into a pile of guano.
Bambam’s jaw dropped. "Maribel? My Maribel?" LOS PICAPIEDRA XXX - Despedida de soltero de Bambam
"Surprise, big guy," Vilma purred. "Maribel paid for the Premium Extinction Package ."
A cheer erupted. On a makeshift throne made of a broken cart wheel sat Bambam. But this wasn't the little bald baby in a leopard onesie. This Bambam was a mountain of a man—a champion of the Bedrock Bodybuilding League, with biceps like granite boulders and a beard that could scratch a record. His bachelor party was legend before it even started. As the night reached a fever pitch, Pedro
The door to the cave flew open. In walked the entertainment: .
As the credits rolled—over shots of Pablo crying in the corner, Betty selling the gelatin shots to a rowdy group of Neanderthals, and Señorita Piedra arm-wrestling Vilma for the last brontosaurus burger—a title card appeared: Bambam had to drink a shot from a
Pedro’s face turned the color of a cooked lobster. "Wait, what?"
Bambam burst out laughing. A deep, booming laugh that shook the stalactites. He picked up Maribel, kissed her, and said, "That's why I'm marrying you."
But just as she was about to give Bambam a lap dance involving a vine and a whole lot of hope, the cave entrance exploded.
Two stagehands rolled out a massive, heart-shaped rock. It was hollow. Inside, a silhouette writhed. The music turned slow and sleazy. The rock cracked open.