He slid down the doorframe until he was sitting on the threadbare carpet. His room was a museum of a younger self: guitar picks that no longer inspired him, a half-finished model of a ’69 Charger, a stack of college brochures he hadn’t opened. Everyone kept asking, “What do you want to do with your life?” As if seventeen was supposed to be the answer and not the question itself.

He hadn’t known how to explain that the shaking was relief. That he’d been holding his breath since the day his dad left, and her lips had made him exhale. So he’d laughed, said something stupid like “It’s cold in here,” and left the closet. He’d walked home alone in the rain, hating himself for running away from the one person who might actually see him.

The Weight of Seventeen

She looked up, startled.

Then she’d pulled away and said, “You’re shaking.”

Rocco stared at the screen. The point. A gravel beach down by the old quarry where kids went to drink warm beer and pretend they weren’t terrified of Monday morning. Last week, he’d watched a girl named Mia throw a bottle into the lake so hard it skipped six times. She’d laughed, but her eyes had been dead. He recognized that look. It was the same one he saw in the mirror after his father’s monthly phone call—the one where the old man promised to come to a baseball game and then found a reason to cancel by the second sentence.

He thought about Lena. She’d be there. She’d be wearing that denim jacket with the frayed cuffs, probably sitting on the hood of someone’s car, her feet dangling. She’d look up when he arrived, and she wouldn’t say Where have you been? She’d just tilt her head, like she already knew.

“Okay,” he said. His voice came out steady. That was another skill: the steady voice. The one that said I’m fine when his insides were a riot.

He walked out into the September dusk, the air sharp with the promise of autumn. Seventeen was not an answer. Seventeen was a bridge, and he was standing in the middle, the past a dim shoreline behind him, the future a fog he couldn’t see through. But the wind on his face felt like something. Like maybe, just maybe, he wasn’t broken. Like maybe he was just becoming.